Sunday, September 12, 2010

On 9/11

Today was 9/11.  Today was my day off.  I woke up later in the morning.  Mrs. Fuzz made breakfast for the kids and needed me to get a few things for her from the store.  It was a quick and uneventful trip.  The neighborhood seemed the same today as it does every other day.  No flags, no stillness, just the normal noise and feel. 

Periodically I thought about the towers, the pentagon, and the field.  I thought about the people responsible and the people who died.  I didn't talk about it but it was heavy on my mind throughout the day.  Every year on this day I ask myself the same question: how do you honor the dead on the anniversary of such a horrific event? 

I think the answer is different for everyone and maybe it changes with time.  I remember being confused and in awe on the day it happened.  At first I thought it was a horrible accident.  Then as the news started to come in that it wasn't an accident, but a terrorist attack, I remember feeling despair and then anger.  I couldn't believe that anyone would try, let alone succeed, in such an act against the most powerful nation on earth. 

So today, I revisited those feelings quietly to myself.  Today the answer to this question was this.  Today to honor the dead, I can be better.  I am lucky enough to be alive.  I have a beautiful wife and children.  I have a job I love that allows me to contribute in a tiny way to the fight.  So I can be better in the hopes that I will someday deserve what I am so blessed to have.  I can be a better son.  I can be a better father.  I can be a better husband.  I can be a better brother.  I can be a better cop.  I can be a better person.

I tried to do that today.  I hope I succeeded. 

6 comments:

Sister Copinherhair said...

Just by having that on your conscience, I think you did.

Cop Mama said...

And that's all we can do. Good for you.

I went for a run yesterday and thought about that day the whole time. In the end, like you said, we can take the lessons from that day and try to do better.

Handcuffed Heart said...

Love it. Especially the 'beautiful wife' part. :)

FabuLeslie said...

Such tough memories. Even more so for people in your social circles.

On another, more happy note, thanks for putting me in the model citizens blogroll! I'm honored.

Momma Fargo said...

Late catching up. Great post. Love the part about family.

Ann T. said...

This is lovely. Very inspiring.
Ann T.