Saturday, December 5, 2009

Day 2 of the in-laws

I just survived day 2 of the in-laws, and you know what? It's going really well. It couldn't be any better actually. I was nauseous all day Friday, but just a few minutes into their arrival I was set at ease. I've mentioned I'm not a shopper, but I needed a few things and I must say that shopping helped with the nausea a little. I bought some gray suede-ish ankle boots, some new jeans, and a couple of tops. I also had to get a new winter coat.

HF came home this morning and was having trouble falling right to sleep. He's supposed to go straight to bed so that he can get up a little earlier than usual to spend time with his parents. He was thinking a lot about something he had to do last night. He had to shoot a deer that was impaled on a fence. There was no way of saving it. I asked him not to tell me any details if that was alright because it would probably make me cry. No joke. But he had to make the decision what to do and he decided that that was what he needed to do. Everyone agreed with him and so he did it. And it was over quick. He was 100% okay with it, but he was thoughtful about it because he has never killed a living thing before. I know to a lot of you this isn't a big deal to talk about or whatever, but I'm just glad that HF has "brothers" that he can talk to about things that I won't allow him to go into great detail with me. So I'm curious if any of you have a list of off-limits conversations. We might have talked about this before. Mine is pretty short.
  1. Animals having to be killed while alive and looking at you (I'm serious!)
  2. violent or sexual assaults against women and children.
If it's important to him to come to me with something then I disregard my rules and I can handle it, but he's okay with sparing me the details and he'll fill me in on how he went to his partner or another trusted brother and how that conversation went. That sort of thing. It seems to be working out for us. I think I mentioned before that I sobbed for hours after watching an episode of Law and Order that was about a rape. It still haunts me. It's not like I keep myself in a little sheltered bubble. I love knowing what I'm up against in the world. But some details are best left to the professionals.

On a happier note, welcome to Anna, a newly blogging police girlfriend. After just one post she already seems really cool. She's a hula/Tahitian dancer and says she has a bucket list that continues to grow. I'm curious to learn what's on that bucket list. I need to come up with a list. I'm too late to do the 30 things by 30, since I'll be 30 in January though. Maybe I will do a 40 things by 40. 10 years ought to be enough time, right?

11 comments:

TM said...

Glad to hear that everything is going well with the in-laws. Only a few more days left, let it keep on flowing well.

As for the off limit topics, I have yet to stumble across any, but I won't say that there won't be any in the future.

OrdinaryLife said...

Glad to hear things are going well! My in-laws live close by, so we never have extended visits from them....although I am ready for them to go home after a few hours here!
I tried to think of off-limits topics, and I don't think we really have any. Except for maybe the horrible jokes the guys all tell each other. I don't want to hear them, I will probably be offended, so he better just keep them to himself!

Christopher said...

Sara doesn't have any topics that are off-limits, I just tend to heavily sensor the information I relate. It bothers her that often she finds out what has occured through my blog, but for me, it's easier to let the written word tell the story than through a discussion. Usually whatever it is is pushed to the background where it ferments for some time, and then comes out as a blog post later. Catharsis.

mrsofficer said...

Hi MrsFuzz thats why you have been MIA, the INLAWS lol. As I have mentioned we live like 5 houses down from them.Not bad being I have been with the hubby since I was 18 and lived with them. They are like my very own. I dont always agree with them BUT I respect them because they have always done nothing but help and support me.And its so nice for my kids to be so close to them. They all go there almost everyday, and I think my inlaws love it! :) I hope this time gets you guys closer together. As far as off topics it pretty much anything against a child. My hub's can't stand that. He responded once to a missing child and knew something was up. Later that day him and his partner discovered the 18month old stompped to death in a trash can.:( It was done by the boyfriend bc he wouldn't stop crying? This was really hard for the hubs since we have small ones. I don't know how they compose themselves after that.

Damsel Underdressed said...

In a way, I think I am destined to be a police wife someday because I CAN listen to those stories. Child abuse bothers me a little but I'd still rather know the details than not. I prefer to be informed.

KD said...

no... we don't have any topics off limits ~ but like someone else said that doesn't mean there won't be in the future. I actually really don't like hearing the dept gossip, though. Prefer to stay out of that one and be completely naive if/when I meet coworkers over there. DH generally stays out of the gossip, but some people will open their mouths and tell anybody anything no matter if you want to hear it or not! :-/

Kimber said...

Nothing is off limits around here either unless he is legally bound to not tell me of course. Wait, I take that back, if it is really gooey I don't want to know. That is the only way I can describe it.
In laws. Um... yeah.

Slamdunk said...

We did not have any off-limit topics. Actually at the time, the Mrs. had a graduate school job and was working regularly with our agency's sex abuse detectives on child cases. She had more awful stories than I did on that topic.

Stacia said...

glad your visit is going well! We don't really have any off limit topics, but I don't like seeing the pictures of the children who have been abused.... he showed me one before court one time (hot iron to the back) never really want to have a visual after that!

Jillian said...

We don't really have a list per say but I prefer for him not to tell me about extremely dangerous things that he did that night. Anything that gives me more reason to worry about him more than I already do (which is A LOT) can sometimes be a bit much for me to handle. As for his actual work experiences, stuff like that doesn't bother me... Just when it concerns his safetly directly. Maybe that's selfish? Not sure!

Natalie said...

For me, it's the abuse on the innocent that I can't tolerate. I also don't like to know details behind any case involving children because it makes it too real for me. He doesn't like reliving the unpleasantness with me because it makes him angry.

He also doesn't state names when talking about most cases for everyone's protection since we live in the small town he protects and serves. Really helpful for me since he still keeps me informed but not on the details.