Tuesday, May 5, 2009

i had to try it at least once

Tonight I had the mail key in my pocket, and HF was looking for it. He approached me and said,

HF: Do you know where the mail key is?"

Me: (In my most dramatic and confrontational voice I could muster up) I DON'T KNOW, I GUESS YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO SEARCH ME.

HF: Okay, step over here please.

Me: Really? okay.

HF: Spread your legs out.

More.

A little further please.

Me: Like this?

HF: Yeah, that's perfect. Okay, now put your hands behind your head and intertwine your fingers. Yes, just like that.

It was over in about 3 seconds and it wasn't fun or romantic in any way. He pulled my hands back a little while they were behind my head and made me lose balance. Then in a very mechanical and professional manner conducted his search. When he got to the key he asked if I had any weapons or drugs, and then he pulled out my key. I said I was a little disappointed and that I thought it would be a little different because I was his wife, but he treated me just like anyone else.

He went to get the mail.

We got a check for $300 from a family member! We already know where that's going.

Tomorrow's itinerary: My brother, a cop in CA, and his wife get here.

10 comments:

Helen said...

Try it when you have less clothing on next time. :)

Unknown said...

that is way too cute! I know, when you want them to get all into the moment, they go "Cop" on us, don't they. lololololol!
(And I agree with above comment!!)

Erin said...

When my hubs was in Academy, I volunteered to help him practice. Apparently, he hadn't planned on a strip search either :)

Natalie said...

Ditto, ditto, ditto! He almost sprained my whole arm when he searched me, but give it some time. He knows how handsome I think he looks in his uniform, and I think it would totally make his night if I were to ask him now. ;)

Because of Love said...

Yeah, I am with you. Before Alyse came along I was a teacher. Josh came in for Safety Day or Career Day or something. All the kids wanted to see the handcuff so he said that he would handcuff me. I thought he would be nice to me, but good Lord! I think he was trying to pull my arm off. My 3rd graders loved it. Me, not so much!

Anonymous said...

Same here, hubs was very routine about it. I think it's to show wifey how professional about it, otherwise he would get the wrath of "So you touch everyone like that!!??"

Even thought they have to have female officers...

Idunno.
Have a good one!

Momma Val said...

Oh boy! He's got cop-idous already! Well, think my husband would take advantage of me in any way he could if given the chance. I do like to harass my husband regularly, they do get a little mechanical both mentally and physically from the job. Gotta tease him back to himself often. Usually it works :)

Anonymous said...

Oh please my Officer is all over me when I play that routine.. It usually is code for tickle time... ending with me calling uncle and giving him what ever he was asking for!! There's no routine about him searching me ;-)
-Dispatcher

MotorCop said...

Not at all the way that story should end. Probably tired from all the Academy Shenanigans. Next time, put on your best D.I. voice and yell at him, "Drop and give me 20!!!" Smart money says he'd do it.

mrs. fuzz said...

i left out that before he went to get the mail and I had told him my disappointment in how things went down, he kissed me and told me, "not in front of the kids". He's probably right.