Wednesday, September 30, 2015


You might have seen this on Facebook as of late. I am not sure where the original source is from, but it is being shared by the thousands via here. A lot of it resonated with HF when he read it. It is true that police officers see things that people aren't meant to see. Things so awful and hidden from public we can't even imagine its existence. LEOs should be loved and supported in this, not abused by the very people they are protecting. If I could give one gift to the world, it would be the ability to see things through another's eyes, or shoes. Whichever metaphor you prefer. Just read this and share your thoughts. It's so great. 

"Those who fight monsters inevitably change. Because of all that they see and do, they lose their innocence, and a piece of their humanity with it. If they want to survive, they begin to adopt some of the same characteristics as the monsters they fight. It is necessary. They become capable of rage, and extreme violence. 

There is a fundamental difference, however. They keep those monster tendencies locked away in a cage, deep inside. That monster is only allowed out to protect others, to accomplish the mission, to get the job done.....Not for the perverse pleasure that the monsters feel when they harm others. In fact, those monster tendencies cause damage...GUILT, ISOLATION, DEPRESSION, PTSD. There is a cost for visiting violence on others when you are not a monster. Those who do so know one thing...The cost inflicted upon society as a whole is far greater without those who fight monsters. That is why they are willing to make that horrible sacrifice so that others may live peaceably.

Before you judge one of us, remember this...

We witness things that humans aren't meant to see...and we see them repeatedly. We perform the duties that you feel are beneath you. We solve your problems... Often by visiting violence upon others. We run towards the things that you run away from. We go out to fight what you fear. We stand between you, and the monsters that want to damage you. You want to pretend that they don't exist, but we know better. We do the things that the vast majority are too soft, too weak, too cowardly to do.

Your life is more peaceful.....because of us.

The current political climate in this country holds that there is nothing worth fighting for. Submission is the popular mantra. Warriors are decried, denigrated, and cast as morally inferior. We know how childish, how asinine, and how cowardly that mindset is.

We know this.....There ARE things worth fighting, and dying for. We know that not every problem can be solved through rational discourse...that some problems can only be solved through the application of force and violence. And, while we do prefer the former....we are perfectly capable of the latter.

We believe that fighting what others fear is honorable, noble, and just....and are willing to pay the price for that deeply held belief. Why? For us, it isn't a choice...

It is what we are. We are simply built that way."

Thursday, September 24, 2015

Home Depot Employee

Home Depot Kitchen Design Tool Logo

I was shopping at Home Depot for a shop vac, and a nice older gentleman asked me if I needed any help. I eventually settled on a Rigid 16 gallon wet/dry vacuum with a detachable blower. Before I could load it up, he asked, "What does your husband do for a living?" I was hesitant at first and then I said quietly, "He's a police officer". He then said to me, "So he's gone a lot from home? Works a lot of holidays and special occasions? You have to do a lot of things around the house by yourself?" I answered "yes" to everything. He said, "I was in the military for many years and I know how hard it is on the family to be gone so much. Tell your husband thanks for his service." He took out his box cutter and opened the box. I was confused and probably looking at him like he was crazy, and then he said, "Oops. Since it's opened, I"m going to have to give it to you 30% off." Then he winked at me and carried it to the front of the store and made sure I had help out to my car. It took me completely by surprise. His kindness really touched me. There are great people out there! In this line of work we rarely look for or see the good in others, but it's there if we pay attention.

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

Police-Themed Man Cave

Does your man fantasize about having his own man cave? Mine does and I am always looking for inspiration for the someday-maybe-possibly-could be-hopefully soon man cave. There are some fun things out there. Check these out!

Remote Gun Lamp

Tactical Firearm Concealment Shelves

Marshall Amplifier Fridge

LIGHTED Hunter Green w/ Dark Brown Trim Dart Board Backboard/Surround Dartboard Cabinet  - For Game Room, Man Cave or Gift Idea
And it wouldn't be a woman's touch without a 'beautiful' bouquet of flowers now would it...
Hollow Point Bullets Flower Pot

What's in your dream man cave?

Tuesday, September 22, 2015

Word of the Day: Holster Sniffer

Word of the Day

I always laugh to myself when HF is talking and he throws in "cop slang". Sometimes I have to stop him in the middle of his stories to ask him what he means. Sometimes they forget that not everyone knows what they are saying. For example,  Holster Sniffer.

According to HF: Somebody who is more interested in law enforcement than he is in joining law enforcement, usually in a positive way. They kind of worship cops, might be a wannabe cop, but can't for one reason or another. They might also consider themselves experts without having been there, done that. 

Do you have the same definition as HF? Or does it mean something else where you live?

Also, I just saw that there is an app called Cop Slang. Anyone ever use it? I'm wondering if it would come in handy when hanging with my guy and his cop buddies. . .

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

Stinky Body Armor: another possible solution

If you are like me, a great deal of time is spent trying to get the STANK out of under armor shirts and ballistic vests. I have researched online, talked to other wives and officers, and I think I have heard just about it all. Febreeze, Odoban, washing in vinegar and baking soda and then air drying, etc. I think we have even discussed it on here before with many of you commenting about what methods you use to take care of the nasty odor. I found temporary success with a few of these methods, but it is never what I hope for.

Enter SECRET. You know, "Strong Enough for a Man, Made for a Woman"? Yes, that SECRET. HF was in the locker room and an officer was rubbing Secret all over his torso and back. Basically all around his middle area. HF was like, "What are you doing?!" He tells HF that a firefighter friend told him about it. And it prevents your armor and under armor from stinking. And the scent releases into the armor and that's all it smells like. He also said he hadn't cleaned it in 3 months. HF took a sniff and said it smelled nice! So there you have it. Secret deodorant for women. SO FAR SO GOOD.
Also, do any of you use a Cool Cop? I've heard that also helps with the stink because it's helping with the sweat. Would you recommend it? Can it be easily removed in an emergency situation? And can you jimmy rig one yourself with a few cheap parts?

Friday, September 11, 2015


Guess the Cop Game

Remember when I made that Guess the Cop game for HF's academy graduation party? A lot of people have asked for a copy of the file these last few years so I made it as a free printable for anyone to have and use if they so desire. It's not anything fancy, and I'm definitely not tech savvy, just something I threw together. I also have a title page and the answers as printables if you visit my Scribd page by clicking on my name just below.  You can print everything out and put it in a binder and let the games begin! Doesn't have to be for a graduation party. Could be for a retirement, promotion, etc. Enjoy!

Thursday, September 10, 2015

Fuzz Family Update

I started this police wife blog almost 7 years ago. Our baby was just a couple of months old, and our two other littles were just 3 and 6. HF was finishing up in the police academy, and we were living in a townhouse in the middle of the city HF works in. We felt like we were just surviving. Trying to make it another day. It was crazy.

Fast forward a few years later. It's still crazy. But in a different way. Our baby is almost 7. Daisy and Luke are 12 and 9. HF has been a police officer and now SWAT for over 6 years now. I started working. We bought our first house in a suburb of the city HF works for, and we are surviving. I would even venture to say that we are thriving. 

HF loves his commute. It gives him time to decompress and clear his head before he gets home. Our neighborhood is safe and quiet, and the kids can walk to school. We love being in our own home away from the city. We notice a difference in our stress, our attitudes, and honestly, we feel a little more grownup. 

Over the last couple of years my absence could best be explained by just plain old life. As my kids get older they have more activities. I am able to work again with the kids in school full time. We began looking for a home. I became more involved in our community and church. I also became more involved with our state's police wife groups. All in all, life's balancing act is just that. A balancing act. Getting organized, taking care of our needs, then figuring out what's most important and prioritizing as such. 

Although my police wife blogging took a back burner, police wife, or family life has continued. The hours upon hours of working, the side jobs (all so he can bring home a decent wage). Don't forget overtime and training. Occasional worry about HF when he goes to work. Lying awake some nights with worry. I plan with other police wives how to improve public perception. We think of ways to enhance the lives of our LEOs. We don't broadcast our "police-ness" for safety reasons, and we talk to the kids a lot about how to be safe and what they should and shouldn't say or talk about in public. It's ridiculous. But important. 

Gone are the days of everything feeling brand new or uncertain. Heightened awareness still, yes. That will never change, but now it's natural. A part of him. A part of us. We move about our day like anyone else, but there is that sense of what sets us apart that embodies our minds and our hearts. With all its challenges, faults, as well as its merits, it still feels like this is what we were meant to do and we feel that honor and that pride that only those in the know can speak of, however openly or secretly it has to be.

I am back to blogging. Talking about all things police related. It's good to be back.

Wednesday, September 9, 2015

Tuesday, September 8, 2015

Positive LEO sites

I've been following some LEO Facebook pages that focus on the positive side of policing. It lifts my spirits to see these stories and reports instead of the ones our lovely media is usually portraying. If you know of any others worth checking out will you please share with me?

Along with these, I also recommend following your local and national police wife pages as well as your city's police department page. It's a good way to help you stay connected to your community and to get involved in local and national police related issues.

Monday, September 7, 2015

Note to Self: Memorize this!

Have you ever been on the phone with customer service and you have to spell something out for them? And you start coming up with words or names like "Bob" and it doesn't help them know what letter you are trying to convey?! Now, maybe you can picture this. You are talking to your LEO and you start coming up with creative names to spell something out and he is getting all frustrated because he is used to talking to people that know their phonetic alphabet. I can't tell you how many times HF has been so annoyed trying to get information to me because he can't understand if I've said "P" or "T", etc. So I surprised him the other day when I was relaying some information to him and I used his precious phonetic alphabet. He was so pleased. It was hilarious. Hey, it's only taken me 6 years to help that aspect of our communication. I think I will print it out and post it in our kitchen command center so our children can help him out too if they need to. 

Do you other halves know your phonetic alphabet or are you like me and say annoying things like, "T as in Top" and he responds, "P as in Pop?" So glad I could do this little gesture for him to make things easier for us both. And we could use some easier in our lives, am I right?!

Sunday, September 6, 2015

DIY thin blue line

I've been busy with my state police wives group these last couple of years. More on that later. One thing that I've noticed is that many of my fellow police wives have some kind of decal on their car that shows their support for police. Whether it's our state's pw organization or some other LEO decal, I've been mostly against it, as is HF for obvious reasons. Even though most people might not know what the decal represents, I think it's wise in general to not label your house or car with any sort of identifiers. I get it, you want to show your support and your pride. And it means something to those that would recognize it. It is sad that we can't openly display our support for our LEOs without worrying about some sort of retaliation.

Along the same lines, we've always been against putting family stick figure decals on our car, or our family name on the outside of our home. That's just us. Even before LEO life. We are just super paranoid private. Now more than ever I think it is imperative that we are vigilant. And to me that means not identifying ourselves as LEO. Now, when I saw this photo above, I loved it. How cool would it be to see that strip of blue on a car in front of you. I guess that could still make you a target, but how cool would it be to do this during police week?! Or whenever you feel like it. All you need is a $3 roll of blue painter's tape and you are good to go!

What do you think? Think this would be low key or would you steer clear of even doing this?

Thursday, September 3, 2015

In This House...

Like some of you, my heart could burst with grief right now. I have plenty of words and thoughts about the craziness that is happening in our country and law enforcement right now, but cannot express them adequately enough at this time. If I've learned anything at all these last few years, it is that the media rarely gets it right. As a whole, they are not supporters of law enforcement. So turn it off. Don't listen to them! It will not help you. Focus all of your energy on the good things. If you are religious, pray for our law enforcement. If you are not religious, consider how to channel your positive thoughts towards law enforcement. Think of all the people that do support law enforcement. Take care of your families, teach them the truth about what is happening. Be kind to your neighbors and strangers, but always stand up for truth.

 When I was a little girl, I would sometimes tearfully ask my mom why there were so many bad people and sad things that happen in our world, and she would say something like this: This world is full of bad and it has been since the beginning of time and there always will be. There is nothing you can do about it. But what you can do is choose how you behave and how you react to it. Look for the good because there is a lot of good out there. I believe there is more good than evil and you will always find what you are looking for. Thanks to cynicism, I am not all that sure if I believe that there is more good than evil, but the sentiment is correct. I have found this to be comforting at many times throughout my life when things seems completely out of my control.

A friend of mine, made us a sign to hang in our home. I love seeing this hung up where I can see it everyday as a special reminder of this life we chose.